THE LOOKAHEAD

Which Week 2 matchup is right for you?

The biggest changes in college football occur between Weeks 1 and 2, and that includes this Quick Slants newsletter feed. For the rest of the season, I’ll be chipping in to help keep you abreast of under-the-radar storylines, emerging dudes, and other general absurdities in the sport we mostly love.

Think of this as a few last-second thoughts to help you maximize your enjoyment of the year’s loveliest season. It’s less “Notre Dame vs Ohio State has MAJOR Playoff implications,” and more “Hey, this Kansas lineman signed an NIL deal for Preparation H. Wacky, huh?” This week, we’ll start pretty tame. Of course, you can always get the full weekly rundown on the podcast.

Quick disclaimer: I would absolutely break down Colorado-Nebraska except 1) we may hit a stack overflow if the Buffs get mentioned even once more, and 2) I haven’t ruled out the possibility that Deion Sanders has deep state operatives scanning the web for negative comments, and I don’t wanna get blasted by Coach Prime at the next postgame presser. It’s a business decision.

😺 For the neutral observer: Tulane vs Ole Miss

Last year, Tulane downed eventual Big 12 champion Kansas State and upset USC in the Cotton Bowl. Quarterback Michael Pratt was near-flawless in Week 1 against a stout South Alabama defense, and head coach Willie Fritz still looks like a Civil War general who eats a bowl of musket balls for breakfast. Ole Miss is favored by about a touchdown with an all-world running back in Quinshon Judkins and a quarterback in Jaxson Dart who sure can hand it off to him — but maybe now with some rediscovered arm talent?

Both squads are plenty likable here, but I also realize few conflicts garner more one-sided popular support than a Group of 5 darling vs. an SEC team. It’s the college football equivalent of a lawsuit between the most anemic child you’ve ever seen and Totally Nondescript Pharma Company™. But this time, that anemic child has an absolute cannon for an arm.

🤑 For the TV network executive: Alabama vs Texas

It’s beautiful, isn’t it? Two of the biggest brands in college football, duking it out on primetime television. Just think of the ratings. The sweet, sweet ratings.

Sure, Alabama’s offense might take some lumps without a clear Heisman candidate operating under center. And yeah, Steve Sarkisian may still be wrapping his head around the concept of a fourth quarter. But who cares? You say this game could get ugly; I say every game looks beautiful when you’re watching it at your third lake house.

💀 For the morbidly curious: Miami vs Texas A&M

Fisher vs Cristobal. Van Dyke vs Weigman. Texas crude oil prices vs LifeWallet stock prices, depending on which school’s athletic director suddenly feels the pressure to dig up a buyout check.

This matchup comes straight from the minds behind the most expensive 5-7 campaigns of 2022, with both sides desperate to buck that trend. There’s no shortage of talent here, with potential for fireworks on both sides of the ball. A&M’s defense is its own constellation of stars, and I believe Miami’s Tyler Van Dyke still poses a threat as one of the game’s most dangerous passers.

Still, with these coaches at these places, the result may not be much prettier than…

😱 For the utterly depraved: Iowa State vs Iowa

The CyHawk game might be the perfect rivalry. A blend of hatred and Midwestern politeness where the outcome often comes down to which team has the better punter. Or maybe which team’s quarterback wants it more, “it” being “his parlay to hit”. Allegedly. 

Jokes aside, few coaches do more with less than Kirk Ferentz and Matt Campbell. You can laugh all you want about Brian Ferentz’ drive for 325 until it’s your team getting choked out 13-6 despite allowing 62 passing yards.

This one probably won’t be pretty, but with the yet-unrealized potential of Iowa quarterback Cade McNamara and the omnipresent threat of chaos in Ames, it’s still worth tuning in.

-Bradley Hohulin

GET IN OUR WEEK 2 PICK’EM CHALLENGE!

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THE LOOKBACK

Things you missed from last week

So, there’s a small chance Caleb Williams might come back next season instead of running off immediately to the NFL, according to his father in this GQ profile:

Mack Brown did not mince words after the NCAA ruled transfer WR Tez Walker ineligible for the 2023 season:

Ross Dellenger popped the hood on SMU’s aggressive campaign to join the Power 5 and it’s wild:

Here’s how Florida State shredded LSU’s man coverage, from our friend Geoff Schwartz who put together this 10-minute video exclusively for us over at Verballers.com:

Yeah, they’re gonna have to re-release the Big Ten schedules for 2024 and 2025 now that Oregon and Washington joined. Adam Rittenberg says to expect that schedule release soon:

-Ty Hildenbrandt

THE VERBALLERHOOD

College Football’s Samoyed Saturday is here

True to form, we continued our weekly tradition of giving the college football week an alternate title. This week’s combination of home underdogs with significant schedule fluff (for some teams) led us down the path of Samoyed Saturday. Yes, that’s Ty’s Samoyed pictured above, because the internet seems to respond well to dogs.

If you’re as excited as we are for the bark, bite and majesty of Samoyed Saturday, we encourage you to do the following:

📱 Call the Reverb Line at 855-VERBAL3 (855-837-2253)

While you’re watching the games this weekend, call our voicemail line and leave us a real-time reaction. The more emotion, the better. Really go for it. We’ll play our favorites on our midnight reaction podcast. Speaking of which…

📺 Watch our live reaction special on Saturday at midnight ET

Our midnight YouTube live streams are where all the cool kids hang out to break down the week that was. We’ll give our reactions to all the big games, play your aforementioned Reverbs, mix it up with the commenters and celebrate another great week of college football. Here’s the link to tomorrow’s stream.

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The college football community, as a whole, likes to sample college football podcasts around the start of the new season. Your reviews really help turn passersby into loyal members of the Verballerhood. Please consider leaving us a 5-star rating and review if you listen over on Apple Podcasts!

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-Dan Rubenstein