SEC Media Daze, Sam Hartman's Rib & When Jon Hamm met Tom Cruise

1) SEC takes center stage

This afternoon marks the conclusion of SEC Media Days, the annual promotional event that masquerades as a grand meeting of college football minds. As you already know, no conference takes itself more seriously than the SEC, which is what gives this event its true charm. Message boards have been ablaze all week long. If we could harness this energy, we’d no longer be reliant on fossil fuels or maybe even the Sun.

It’s very easy to get lost with so much content flying around. I know, because I’ve read through all the transcripts. Here’s a very incomplete sampling of the quotes and quips that you should jot down as you prepare for the season:

Nick Saban on Alabama’s quarterback situation: “When somebody separates themselves — and nobody knows for sure when that is, I can’t establish a timetable … it’s going to happen when it happens. That’s the way it’s going to be.”

An uncomfortable Jimbo Fisher on whether Bobby Petrino will actually get to call Texas A&M’s plays: “Bobby was hired for a reason,” Fisher said. “Tremendous guy, tremendous football mind. Hopefully he’ll call the game and have suggestions.“

Kirby Smart on the origin of Georgia’s new team slogan: “This year we studied the New Zealand All-Blacks, most successful sports team in the history of really teams, over 100 years they’ve had the highest winning percentage ... We took a title and a mantra from them and studied those things for six weeks because we don’t want complacency ... One of their big mantras is ‘better never rests.’ We believe that. Those are strong words now when you think about it. Think deep on it. Better never rests.”

Hugh Freeze on Auburn’s new faces: “The fact that we have 42 new players and I don’t know all their names yet.. that’s the way I feel.. I do“

Eli Drinkwitz on the embattled Brady Cook: “Day one we go to practice, Brady Cook will step out there with the ones … But, no different than every position on the field. There’s nothing guaranteed and everybody’s got to battle for their positions.“

Sam Pittman with high praise for his new offensive coordinator: “ I hired Dan Enos because I thought he was the best play-caller I've ever worked with.“

Brian Kelly on using artificial intelligence: “I think it’s exciting and something that we’re about to venture into.“

2) Well, that ended exactly how we expected…

My fever dream of a conference booting a school due to a petty war of words is now officially over. Per reports, San Diego State will be allowed to stay in the Mountain West treehouse in 2024, as long as its willing to cover the conference’s legal bills. Let’s hope we never have to have this conversation again until San Diego State actually leaves for the Pac-12 at some point in the near future.

Remember, this whole plan hinges on the Pac-12 finalizing its next round of media rights. That was supposed to happen in April. And then June. And then July. And now, well, sometime soon. My hunch, after following this story for many months, is that the conference will cobble together something that keeps the league from falling apart. Otherwise, there wouldn’t been more reports about Oregon and Washington getting antsy. As always, stay tuned!

3) Thumbs up to Horns Down?

Oh, I almost forgot this fun little nugget from SEC Media Days. Our friend Brett McMurphy chatted with John McDaid, the SEC’s coordinator of officials, and got the scoop on whether the infamous “Horns Down” gesture will constitute taunting. You can click on the full tweet above (or on this link), but the crux of the matter is that “every single occurrence is not an act of unsportsmanlike conduct.” Like all things in life, context matters. Practice your Horns Down with caution, folks.

4) Uh, excuse me?

I’ll be honest and say that I triple-checked to make sure that this quote wasn’t from a Sam Hartman deepfake. It’s 100% real. What on earth is going on here?!

Would you wear a rib necklace? Check that, a human rib. Look, we all went through a weird phase with puka shell necklaces, but this is next-level, serial-killer strange.

5) A fitting tribute

Per the interwebs: “Neckties originated in 17th century Europe, when Croatian mercenaries serving in France wore knotted neckerchiefs to signal their position and alliances. King Louis XIV of France admired the neckwear so much that he began wearing ties as a status style item.“

I agree with the late coach. It’s time to get past this as a society.

✍️ Others Receiving Votes

Jon Hamm’s story of meeting Tom Cruise for the first time is pretty awesome:

Here’s what happens when you trade in an old phone:

While you’re in the learning spirit, here’s how footballs are made:

WHAT'S GOOD IN THE VERBALLERHOOD?

This week, we spent some time going through the wackiest message board postings on the web, courtesy of our friends at Message Board Geniuses. Next week, we’re back strong with two episodes as we begin the slow march to the 2023 college football season with our conference previews.

Listen to the podcast by clicking here or check out this week’s episodes below. You can also view full episode videos and smaller clips on our YouTube channel. If you’re already a subscriber, I’d kindly emplore you to tell as many of your friends as possible about The Solid Verbal College Football Podcast.

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