Introducing the Weekly Top 5½

Happy Thursday! If the internet is to be believed, it's both National Meatball Day and National Panic Day. I don't believe the two are related, though I can envision a few scenarios in which they could be. For what it's worth, college football does live at that same intersection of "savory" and "sheer terror," so there's that.

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Onwards!

Let's take a knee, boys and girls. When I repurposed this email a few weeks ago, the intention was never to write as many words as I did last week. I named this thing "Quick Slants" for a reason. But as one half of the most successful, longest running college football podcast on the web, sometimes I get a little long-winded. Forgive me, Verballers.

As we wade deeper into the college football offseason, most weeks won't require deep introspection or an examination of the sport's many, concurrent, existential crises. Sometimes, you just need a few links —  college football or otherwise — to kill a few hours before it's time to clock out.

Here's a very unofficial ranking of the 5½ things that got my juices flowing over the last week:

1) Anthony Richardson is about to get paaaaaaaaid

The NFL silly season is off to a hot start. As such, some draftniks are now touting Florida's Anthony Richardson as the top overall pick in next month's draft and throwing around comparisons to Cam Newton.

On one hand, Richardson ran a 4.43 and set records for the best ever vertical and broad jumps by a quarterback. His measurables are, quite literally, off the charts. On the other, his completion percentage last season was 53.8% along with a touchdown-to-interception ratio of 17:9. At the moment, Richardson's forte is in the running game, where he logged 654 yards and 9 touchdowns in 2022. As Dan pointed out on Tuesday's podcast, there are many reasons why Richardson is very much NOT Cam Newton, at least not yet.

In related news, Bryce Young's measurables (5'10 1/8", 204 lbs) definitely did not create the same buzz, though he still projects as a top ten pick. On a brighter note, Michigan cornerback DJ Turner ran a 4.26 in the 40-yard dash, the fourth fastest time clocked since 2003. ESPN lists him as the No. 5 corner in this year's draft class.

2) Nothing to see here, folks...

The clock is still ticking on the Pac-12 as George Kliavkoff negotiates the conference's next round of media rights, about which I've written extensively over the last couple newsletters. I'm annoyed, if only because we're college football fans and we shouldn't have to worry about media deals breaking up conferences. Anyway, the latest official update is... there is no update. Keep calm and carry on.

Meanwhile, rumors persist that so-called "Corner Schools" — Arizona, Arizona State, Colorado and Utah — are getting antsy for Kliavkoff to show his work. Perhaps that's because new Big 12 commissioner Brett Yormark is ready to take any school that falls off the back of the truck. Yormark is acting like the guy at the poker table who re-raises every single hand. I've never been able to win with that strategy, but I admire the intensity.

Also, disclaimer... it seems all major conference news breaks on Thursdays and Fridays, which isn't exactly compatible with the Quick Slants email schedule. Keep your head on a swivel out there.

3) Everything is bigger in Texas, including preseason non-stories!

Nothing says "It's March!" like manufacturing a very obvious bullet point into a bigger college football story. Exhibit A: "Texas coach Steve Sarkisian confirms quarterback competition between Arch Manning, Quinn Ewers." Was anyone expecting something different? 

The circumstances here are pretty interesting, with two No. 1 overall recruits duking it out. The smart money, for now, is on Ewers winning the job, though it'll be hard to keep a Manning off the field if the offense goes sideways. 

4) Attendance was up last year... and nobody knows why 📈

If I had a dollar for every time I was asked about college football's attendance problem, well, I'd have a few dozen dollars. It's no secret that fewer people have been going to games over the last decade. Attendance figures had decreased over each of the last seven years.

So, this report from Dennis Dodd is super interesting. College football actually saw a 5% increase last season, its largest annual increase since 1982. Why? 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Dodd floats a bunch of theories that may have contributed to the increase, but it feels a bit like he's guessing at the true meaning of life. He doesn't have a clue and I don't, either. Major bonus points, though, for putting this piece together. It's really well done.

I screenshotted the chart below of the conference-by-conference breakdown. Shoutout to the ACC for leading all conferences with a 14% increase. We can have a separate discussion about the MACtion that the internet seems obsessed with.

It will be interesting to see how these numbers change in 2023 and certainly in 2024 as college football is set for a gigantic overhaul, with big teams moving conferences and the College Football Playoff expanding to 12-teams.

5) Chip re-ups with UCLA

UCLA extended Charles "Chip" Kelly through 2027. There was a moment in time, not so long ago, when we debated whether or not Chipper was enjoying himself in Westwood. Scratch that. He'll make $6.1 million in 2023 and 2024 before getting bumped up to $6.2 million from 2025-2027.

The Bruins are in an interesting spot headed into the 2023 season. By the numbers, they return only 54% of their offensive production from last year. But incoming freshman Dante Moore might be the most start-able quarterback from this past recruiting cycle. Another 9-win season seems doable.

Others Receiving Votes

• Contracts for NFL quarterbacks are officially drunk. A day after Geno Smith signed a 3-year frontloaded deal that will pay him $52 million in 2023, the Giants signed Daniel Jones to a 4-year, $160 million agreement. To those that listen to the podcast, you'll know that my fandom for Big Blue has never fully recovered from Dave Gettleman taking Jones No. 6 overall in the 2019 Draft. I still can't believe he did that. I'm not a Jones fan, even after his renaissance season, but I'll never bail on the Giants as long as Saquon Barkley, arguably my favorite college player of all time, is still healthy and on the roster.

• This article titled "Would You Date a Podcast Bro?" appears to be a serious, albeit pointless, attempt at a relationship advice column. This doesn't offend me as a podcaster, it offends the 26-year old, single version of me that once tried playing the "I'm a podcaster" card at a bar. Back then, the term "podcast" was from an alien language and would generate blank stares. You know, when people look at you like you have two heads. Kids these days don't know how easy they have it.

• Though I don't fully agree that all the streaming boxes suck now, I'll read anything David Pierce has to say.

THE VERBALLERHOOD

WHAT'S GOOD IN THE VERBALLERHOOD?

Dan took the fam out to Southern California to escape the last gasp of a grueling Chicago winter and we turned our focus to the NFL Draft, which got a lot of attention, what with Bryce Young's height and Anthony Richardson's measurables. I also flew solo in this morning's episode and chatted with our good friend Pete Sampson of The Athletic about the weirdness of Notre Dame's offseason.

Listen to the podcast by clicking here or check out our individual episodes below. You can also view full episode videos and smaller clips on our YouTube channel.

THIS WEEK'S PODCAST EPISODES:

IN CLOSING, I RECORDED A Q&A EPISODE WITH MY MOM THIS MORNING

Normally, Dan and I connect every Thursday morning for the "Brew & A," our weekly bonus episode posted out to our Patreon community. With Dan being away from his studio, I did the next logical thing and recorded with Mama H. It's not the first time and won't be the last. If you're interested in any potentially embarrassing factoids about Young Ty, head on over to Verballers.com and sign up today!

Thanks for reading. Until next week, stay solid!-Ty Hildenbrandt